Border of Life
by AnotherAppleJuice
Summary: This is a short story about the life and death of Yuyuko. Even in the worst moments there is always hope, even if it is a dim light that shines in the darkest hour.
1. Beggining

Life is a curious thing you know, just like a sigh, begins with the need of air in your lungs and ends with one final breath. All this may happen in the blink of an eye and yet many people can´t notice it. All these collections of memories that pass through our eyes as fleeting images right before our very end, it is what we love the most and also what hurt us. But as many of those who live in this world, does not notice this until death has come for us.

But what if death was always beside you?

What if the end of all life was your very own shadow?

And if death itself causes pain to those who you care and made everyone hate you, even if you did not do anything at all

Is that something you might call life? Living with more fear of people and what they do to you, just because they were trying to save their own life, at the cost of my own pain.

Nobody could call it life… and yet.

Although sometimes I have described that I cannot control death, I still do not know when will I look into its eyes and say that my time is over.

Still, I remain hopeful that everything happens for a reason, that those terrible things have happened always and that they are not wrong. I believe that the gods got their own reasons to let me keep breathing up this day.

My life has been very lonely all these years, locked in this temple, guarded by people that I have rarely seen through the windows, monks that pay a visit sometimes just to check if I am still alive. There are priestesses that look at me with hatred and repulsion during ceremonies and rituals that try to purify me, even if not a single one have done anything at all.

Very few dare to come closer than ten feet away from me. Everyone is so distant, always praying, always clinging to life. Life that I can steal so easily.

I was born fifteen years ago as the first and last child of the Saigyouji family, under the name of Yuyuko. Since childhood I was rejected by my father, who at first seemed to be very happy with my birth, but then he change after my mother death several years later. That one day when she hugged me during the night and stayed right beside me while I slept. My father reminded me of that every day he comes to visit me.

He reminded me that I was to blame for the death of my mother.

The priests and Buddhist monks who visited the family mansion after the burial of my mother, were horrified to feel the presence of death hovering around me, although I cannot quite remember the words that were expressed, I remember very well that I called a monster.

After that day my life would not be the same again.

My father, sad and angry, took me out of the house and locked me up at a nearby temple, where they built a small mansion for me only, the prison where I remain up to this day.

I was only six years old and I was denied of the happiness of childhood, I could not explore, I did not learn to run or jump, I did not play with other children nor enjoy the passing summer.

They stole my freedom.

The first days of my imprisonment, my father visited me just to check that I was given the right services. A couple of women came in at that time, they taught me how to dress, pray, cook, wash, clean and other things I should know for my time in solitude. Then my father and those priests strictly denied everyone to have any kind physical contact with me, saying that to approach within six feet away from me could be dangerous. So, those women taught me from afar, and as I tried to mimic what they were doing, they told me if I was right or not.

The loneliness of the first week was very difficult for me. With six years and with no one to talk to or to play with, none to sit beside me during dinner or anyone that give me their love and understanding, I started slowly falling into despair.

The first days lamenting myself, mourning the death of my mother and my own confinement. Spending all day sitting against the corner of my room, like a punished child who was waiting for her father voice to say that everything is okay. Sad and discouraged to do something, not even hunger could make me forget my pain of being alone.

The days passed and I began to think a little more about what happened, I thought my father was a fool and that he hated me for something I did not commit. I would have never wanted my mother to die; I would never hurt her or anyone else.

So was I hated?

Why did locked me in this place?

What am I doing here?

I was not to blame for the death of my mother and just for because those priests, who filled with my father ears with those lies. They are the real culprits of my confinement, my loneliness.

I began to feel hatred for those who looked at me through the window, at those who passed at certain times to bring bags of rice, vegetables, meat and water. Those damn monks who looked at me with horror and then turn their faces away right before praying loudly. They were the ones that kept me locked. I thought of the hundreds of things they said to my father, and that kept me still here.

-It's a monster!-

-Death haunts around her!-

-This devil child!-

-It's a demon!-

-That girl is dangerous!-

-Stay away from her!-

-Don't be fooled by her looks or she will steal your soul!-

To hear so many bad things in those days only fueled pain in this lonely mansion.

Finally I could not handle any more of it and started screaming desperately, I felt impotence in front those double doors when I pushed them with all my strength. I strike them again and again with no results. Then I started yelling all my resentment and feelings out loudly.

But the reaction I got from them was very different.

I heard footsteps at the other side of the door before a brief silence, but instead of help after I began to cry all I heard was the laughs of those monks ...

Hate.

It was all I felt. Despite being only a child I could feel that pain inside me growing into hatred. I began to think of all those priests, guards and women I had seen those weeks. Then I imagined everyone laughing at me and saying bad things about me again.

I fell down on my knees crying, I could not control it, so I shout desperately as I wanted only one thing in this world.

I wish to no longer see them alive again.

Afterwards I started to hear noises and footsteps on the other side of the door. As I stood motionless wondering what happened. My doubts were answered, when I saw one of the monks opened the door.

His eyes stared at me, full of hate.

So that was how hatred is reflected?

I walk backwards slowly as fear fill my mind. There was something that tried to pull me away as I watched how he pulled a metal object from his clothes. Then I stood motionless, as he approaches me slowly. In that moment I felt something cold that passed right next to me, it was a strange thing back then, but now I know that it was death haunting around me again.

The monk took that sharp object and then run it at me. I was really afraid as I could not even scream when he was in front of me. I heard a loud noise and opened my eyes just to find that the monk fall at my feet. He did not stumble or slipped, he just stopped moving that instant.

His face got no expression and his eyes devoid of all life.

It was just like my mother that day; I realized that he was dead.

Cautiously approaching my hand to his face I remembered he was the one who had brought bags of food the day before.

But why had he hated me so much?

I noticed that the door was open, so I forgot that he died in front of me and a strange joy came over me. I wipe the tears and walk to the door. Without noticing I had a smile drawn on my face and my mood just recovered.

I approached the door and pushed hard, I wanted freedom and all I could think of was to run away from there. But then I felt that the door got stuck on something and could not be opened more than half. I looked through that gap to see outside, just to find out there was a dead monk leaning against the door.


	2. Tragedy

He was dead

His body was staring at me with an empty look as I walk over him. He was engulfed by the eternal slumber just as time frozen. I watched around me just to find that there was more of them. I was horrified to see them, all those monks and guards that just a few minutes ago were talking and laughing of me. Now everyone was dead, with no exception. Everyone got the same expression as they seem to have fallen with no resistance.

Perhaps I was to be blamed for this?

I wished so much to never see them or heard of those people again.

A cold feeling ran down my back, a strong shiver pass through my body and I felt the presence of something unseen hovering around me. Something dangerous and terrible was floating beside me at the moment.

Never in my short life had I felt something like this. Not even the hate of the monk that tried to kill me or the impotence I got when I was scolded by my father, the sorrow of losing my mother or the loneliness of the last few days that filled me with despair in this temple.

Nothing compared to this. It was my own survival instinct that was desperately yelling inside of me.

I slowly began to turn my head and body in the direction of that ominous feeling.

A part of me was trying to run from this place and seek refuge at my house, even if I lost myself in the woods, it would be better than to remain here. Yet my own curiosity was in need to be satisfied.

At that moment I watched with my own eyes the very end of life itself, that fleeting moment when a person is about to die.

This was nothing compared to the stories of how the gods of death do their work, or even how the judges of hell condemn souls. This was very different.

To describe it would be difficult, as I don't know many words that can be of any use.

It was a brief moment that transcends time, as a bird that stops its fly in the sky, and if I can try to explain it in simple words I would only say that life is like a thin line that floats in midair just like a thread that disappears into nothingness when the strands are cut.

I think that humans cannot comprehend this process entirely, and that's why everyone has their own idea of what death is like.

But when I watched it, as a six year old girl, I felt a terrible sadness and grief myself, suffering to see someone else's life ending.

But the true terror happened next because watching a dead person is one thing and seeing what actually caused it was entirely different. Few would understand what death is really, even I don't get it quite right.

All life begins and ends, that is a fact. But right at the very end, something appears to devour the thread inside its black existence. It's hard to say it had a real form itself, as it looked as a black spot that slowly disintegrates the existing life in the person. Even now I don't know it something like that really exists in this world.

Then it disappeared as it vanished in the air.

I remained there without blinking or moving a muscle for a few minutes as I stared into the eyes of the dead body.

I exhale and fall into the ground as I try to regain my breath yet my mind remained blank.

What was that all about?

Why did this happen?

After a few hours, I realized that I was still surrounded by dead bodies scattered on the ground. I get up in silence and I slowly go back again through the door and closed it behind me.

I approached the dead man who had tried to end my life and take the sharp object in his hands, a short sword. I took it with me to my room and there I lay to sleep. My mind still did not assimilate what was happening so I decided to rest and think about it during sleep.

I slept for three days.

When I woke up I still had the weapon in my hands and the feeling that the world was no longer the same as before.

A strong smell came to me suddenly so I leave the sword in my bed and wen to check what it was. The bodies near the door and the entrance were starting to rotten due to the heat and rain of the last days.

I watched the body of the guard near the door and imagine about the others outside, yet I did not wanted to approach them. I feared that he will rise and try to hut me, so I kept my distance.

I did my other activities, like walk the aisles, prepare my meal, watch the clouds in the sky, in the interior garden or sleep in my room. But the fetid smell of death was everywhere.

Four days passed.

Then I included in my activities, taking a look at the dead bodies and mourn for what happened. Now I could never go home again, I can´t go to the nearest village or get close to anyone alive or else they will die because of me.

So for hours I blame myself for their deaths. I knew I was innocent and ignorant of my own curse.

Then a week passed.

I no longer wished to continue my life locked here, but it was the only option I had for now. I prayed daily for hours, as all I wanted was that everything to went back to normal, just like it was before coming to this temple. I asked the gods for my own release, I wanted to free me of this curse.

I wanted my life back, I was willing to do anything for it, even if I had to pay for all the deaths I caused that day. I didn´t care anymore about what price I needed to pay, but I wanted that this nightmare to end.

Yet nothing happened.

So again I went to the dead body near the door, and sat looking at him, wondering why he was so angry that day.

Thus the hours passed until I heard screams on the other side of the door. I was so scared when it started, because at last the bodies of the dead had risen and they were coming for me. I kept watching the motionless body of the man in front of me waiting until he wake up and kill me.

But he did not wake up.

My father opened the door and looked at me with disappointment. I perceived sadness and discomfort on his face. From behind him a pair of monks appeared and covered the body with a blanket and took him away.

As they lift the corpse the scent of death filled the entrance again.

_-Monster… You shall never leave this place-_

Those were the only words I heard from my father that day.

Several women came into the mansion to clean it, including the place where the corpse was trying to remove the foul odor. Other monks brought food again and new guards took the place of the fallen. So everything went back just as the early days of my confinement, but with one difference, my father came here every morning.

Every day I cried as he reminded me of how useless and unworthy I was, then he told me how sad and pathetic my existence was, as my life was worthless and that the only good thing that will ever happen to me would be the cruel fate that awaited me in hell.

_-As long as you live I will remember you the deaths you've caused!-_

_-Twenty__people died because of you!-_

_-Why did the gods has punished me with a monster like you?-_

_-__All the life you stole from these people will lie on your shoulders forever!-_

_\- You will never find forgiveness for what you did!-_

The words of my father were the same every day, as he yelled his hate and frustration at me. People of nearby towns hated me too as the monks spread rumors about a monster that could cause death in people just by watching them.

The years passed and my life seemed as a sad repetition that increased the pain inside my chest.

This routine and solitude had taken over my life and my heart, as I slowly die because all my hopes and dreams are destroyed each day with the harsh words of my father.

I can no longer stand this kind of life.

It's been four years of loneliness and sadness, agony and pain.

That night I went into my room, I lie down and take the short sword of that guard, as I always had under my pillow.

I have decided to end my suffering.


	3. Hope

I was lying in my room staring at the ceiling. I began to remember every single word that made me suffer. I was alone and desperate as I never had the chance to talk to anyone about my pain, not even my father.

It was as if my life ended the day I got locked here. Like the day I killed all those people or the day I take my mother's life .

My mind kept repeating those phrases over and over again, increasing my torture. I wanted to stop thinking, but it was impossible.

The only hope that my depressed self could think of was suicide as if taking my own life was the last choice. But I feared of not seeing the sunlight again, of not being able to look at the sky wishing to fly just like the butterflies that live in the garden.

They were my only friends in these four years, with whom I was able to show at least some affection and love for. I watch them since they were small larvae until their transformation into those beautiful white butterflies. They were the only insects that grow in the garden, I search for more but apparently no other animal live nearby, not birds or rats, so they were safe all their young life until they were able to fly away.

But even now I lost the strength that they used to gave me.

I no longer wanted to live in this prison not I wanted to keep suffering. Yet I did not know if I had the courage to take my own life, after all I was a small ten year old girl. Also the words of eternal torture in hell that my father told me were not entirely encouraging, those judges of the other world sound very frightening.

But was sure I wanted to meet them and receive my punishment?

I was still over my bed, the tears that fall from my eyes start to hurt as well. I felt so sad that death seem to be better than to keep with this kind of life.

I picked up the short sword and bring it to my chest. I figured that if I put it into my beating heart, would be enough to die. I knew that from my father because there were times when he got so mad that he say that he would keep telling me the same words until his heart stop beating.

I took the weapon the best I could and pointed it at my chest. Then it was hard but I push it slowly as part of my tried to resist it. As the blade pierce through my clothes I felt like my mind was yelling but as the tip of the sword cut my skin, my mind stopped.

I cried harder, as now there was blood started to flow from my wound. I felt that it stained my dress as I start to feel a lot more heat in my chest.

But then I realize the name engraved on the blade like there was an ornament of cherry blossoms in the black hilt. At first I thought it was a reference to some sort of ritual or religious passage, because the meaning was "spiritual soul and mind"

This kanji could refer to the family of that monk. It can be read as "Konpaku"

That man I killed could no longer make his dreams come true. I take away his hopes and joy the same day I took his life, as I also stole his future, the chance of having a family and also a dignified death. I reap away all from him the same moment he fall at my feet.

I realized I never knew his name…

I suddenly stopped and removed the blade of my chest. The wound was not deep but it was enough to keep bleeding for a while so I pressed my hand against it and then I stand up.

I walked into the garden hoping to see butterflies once again, but there were none. I returned to the hallway and closed my eyes as I sat there. I felt the wind on my face, I heard the movement of the trees and for the first time here I felt relaxed and calm, in both mind and spirit.

Life was painful and cruel, but that was my punishment. It was the payment for the death of my mother, the monks and guards. At that moment I choose to accept my own death and of those that I killed.

I would no longer live for myself but for every one of them. I died at the time I pressed that blade against me but it was also that sword that reminded me of them so it granted me a new life.

When I realized this several hours passed so I went into the back of the mansion which was connected with a hot spring. As I enter the hot water, I felt something very different as if this was the first time I went there. The red in my clothes washed away in the water, I felt a sharp pain on my chest as the heat went inside the wound and through it into my body as if healing it from all the pain.

After that day everything was different. I started to smile every time my father yelled and scolded me. I began to speak to those monks who came to the mansion with supplies and to the guards behind the big double doors, even if they rarely answered me.

I watched the sky and felt that I got no more weight over my shoulders.

Soon I got enough courage to interrupt my father in his regular morning speech and asked for books for me to read. At first he refused, but my persistence finally won and soon I got them, even if I didn't know the meaning of all the symbols at least I could try to learn it for myself.

I enjoyed every time I prepared my meals, all the time I took care of the garden, the water in the hot springs and as I read a book or a poem.

Soon the days went better and time began to flow without difficulty.

-Five years have passed since then and still in days like this one I´m thankful. If things didn't happened like that I would have never enjoyed moments like this- I told the butterflies that flies around me. Sometimes I repeat this story to them, even if the answer is just a swift moment of their wings or the wind that passes by.

-I´m also thankful, your story is so sad but full of hope that I never get tired of it-

There was a feminine voice that came from the middle of the garden. I was shocked because I was supposed to be the only one here. I lived alone in the mansion so the only possible people that could be around would be the priestesses that came here now and then.

I began to slowly walk across the path in the garden and watched that there was a woman standing under a tree. She was wearing a purple dress and was covering the sun with a parasol, as she turned around as her blond hair waved in the air.

I don't know why but this unexpected visit made me very happy.


	4. Woe

-Hey Yuyuko, good to finally had the chance to talk face to face. My name is Yukari ... -

The woman said with simple words, even I can't believe that anyone would be talking to me like this. I walked over and smiled with joy.

-Hello Yukari, I see you've heard me and know my story. Now I'd like to hear yours if you want to share it with me- I said with encouragement, I had never seen her before. She was not part of the women who neither worked in the temple nor was any of the priestesses who came to visit me a few times a year. But I felt something familiar about her I could not describe.

And suddenly this girl named Yukari, showed out of nowhere in the middle of the garden. She seemed to be a good person but rather mysterious. It was not clear to me how she got here thought.

-Well, if you want to know my story… I probably would explain a lot of things that are hard for you to understand- She said with some humor, trying to not sound offensive about it.

-I'll try as best as I can to understand everything you tell me. I have plenty of time around here you know? - I said trying to be funny; I did not know very well how to hold a conversation in with other people for too long.

-Well if I try to summarize my own story as much as possible, it would be the sad story of a poor woman who has lived alone for many, many years, watching the passage of time and seasons trying to make sense of what humans call life ... - she said with a sad smile as she turned down the little umbrella she was carrying, then took a step forward and slowly approached me.

I felt a chill to see that she came to me and started to recede while the girl approached. People usually do not dare to be near me, much less physical contact. Recalling some of what happened several years ago, I don't want to repeat the same bad thing.

-P-please, d-don't come near me, there-e is n-no -need ... - I said a little embarrassed, not wanting to sound aggressive, much less make it out, just not I wanted my first real conversation in years, ended in disaster.

-People say you can kill them whit just a glare or that you're a woman possessed by a god of death. Some say that you're a monster who takes the life of anyone who approaches you ... - She said while I tried to get back to my room, even if then I remembered that some of the guards called me "the youkai of death" although I am only human.

Suddenly I felt that the road ended and behind me a tree stood in my way of escape. I was trapped there and Yukari was right in front of me, so all I did was close my eyes and hope that nothing bad happens this time. Suddenly I could hear her soft voice over my ear, her face was so close to mine that I felt shivers on my neck.

\- ... I want you to kill me ... – She suddenly said.

I immediately turn to look right into her eyes and yelled.

-I will never do that, I do not want to cause the death of more people, much less that of someone I just met- I said upset and sad. How could someone wish to die like them?.

\- ... You can do it, only you can kill me because I can't die in any other way… please end my suffering... -

I interrupted her with all my courage and I assumed that would be reassuring, something that was denied to me. I hugged her tight and started to mourn over her shoulder. Then I heard her words again.

\- ... Thank you ... -

She said as I felt her strength weakened on how she who leaned against me as if she was falling sleep. I pulled away from her and I could see her eyes closed and then she smiled, just before coughing blood that fell on my face and kimono.

I had done it again. I caused someone death, someone else whose life ended by my hands.

Suddenly I remembered the picture of that monk dying in front of me when I was younger, that give me the strength for not losing hope. I embraced Yukari again and slowly started walking towards the mansion, though it was less than thirty feet maybe less, I move very slowly as I had never picked up large objects or another person before, although she was not entirely unconscious and therefore supported her feet on the ground from time to time.

I don't know how much time passed, but I did it as fast as I could just to get to the stairs I used all my strength to lift her and move her through the hall. Luckily my room is close to the garden so with just another big effort I managed to gently put her over my bed.

Her face was pale but still she said some words with her weak voice. I got up and ran to the kitchen for water and carried it to my room on a cooking pot. I take a handkerchief from my clothes, and used it to wipe her face and neck of blood, but soon I noticed that my tears fell on her. I was desperate but inside I cried for forgiveness for what I had done.

-I want you to die. This is unfair, as you want to die by my hand I never want to do it again and yet it happened... -

-Life is better when you live ... life gives more satisfaction than death ...-

Please, please I…Don't want you to die- my voice slowly broke and tears covered my face.

\- P-lease ... ... l-let me die ... please ... -

She said very quietly, she opened her eyes and raised her hand to my face. Her eyes looked calm and peaceful, perhaps hoping that her path will end soon and with it all her pain. I knew that feeling, just that night when the dagger cut through my chest.

I wish with all my strength to stop this curse and to save her life, even if I die instead of her I wanted that she find happiness someday. Both my heart and head began to ache and the scar on my chest hurt a lot.

I felt my life ended by ceasing to feel my heart beating, and everything went dark as I fell over Yukari. Maybe it was time for me to receive punishment, but at least I know that I tried to save someone from my curse.

\- ... To sacrifice her life for someone like me? ... Why? -

I listened the girl's voice far away, I felt like the air blowing through the bedroom door as it touched my face. The woman keeps saying things but I can't open my eyes.

\- ... The cruelty that people showed before proved that humans are the worst, they are all but species who knows to only cause pain and death. They live in delusions that are so ephemeral and weak that are almost as nothing as leave carried by the wind. I have caused so many wars and death in this world but still find no relief. But you, a human able to erase the existence of life have forgiven me? Someone she had just met and that I would have killed if things were not like now ... –

I was so happy, she had survived. Her words didn't felt bad or distressed, they encouraged me to try to wake up. I wanted to answer her and show her that life was more than pain and suffering, something more than the death of others, I want to show her that life was everything and that it was something precious.

I felt that a little strength returned to me and a soft, slow heartbeat began to give rhythm to my heart. I opened my eyelids a little heavy and turn my face to Yukari to look at her best, she was standing near the door. I opened my mouth and try to say something with all the strength I had in my weak body.

-If you cannot find the meaning of life… then live… Live to the fullest and enjoy the gift of life. No matter how bad the past was it's always better to live to pay for your sins than to die for nothing- I said as clear and strong as I could, though my voice was really something hard to hear.

Yukari stood by the door still watching me, not utter any words as I started to get up. When I stand there she walk to me, this time her eyes did not show anything.

-If my death can relieve some of the pain that is inside you, then I gladly give you my life- I said and smiled, maybe this time my heart would not beat again.

I closed my eyes and wait for the outcome.

I felt her arms clutched around mine and squeezed my back while I heard the sobs of the sad girl crying all the pain and sorrow she had carried for so many years. I embrace and comfort her hoping thereby to cure her agony.

We were both there for several minutes or several hours, I did not realize how much time passed.

After that Yukari released me and pulled away from me, she look away to the other direction and was silent even with tears falling from her eyes. Until that moment I realized that she was not affected by my ability again, maybe I was able to could control it now.

And again time passed, I kept looking at her, remembering and wondering how much pain she had suffered in the past, until a sound interrupted my thinking.

My stomach growled hard and I felt very sorry, as my hunger was noted.

Yukari only looked at me with sadness in his face, so I could only laugh. Laugh with joy and the fact that I break this supposedly serious moment. Her eyes lit up a bit and a slight smile crossed her face.

-Would you like something to eat? - I asked with the intent to start a conversation and maybe this time to know more about her.

-Sure, I would love it- Yukari said as she wiped out the tears.

-Then let's go, the kitchen is this way- I pointed out the door to the next aisle. The sadness and anxiety I felt at some point no longer exist and can assure that she felt the same.

-You have a beautiful hair. Its color looks good on pair with your eyes- she told me as a compliment as she walked beside me.

-Thanks, I try to take good care of it, so I keep it short, I brush and wash diary too…- I replied, my red hair and amber eyes were an inheritance from my mother, and I keep a haircut as she used to.

-By the way I am fifteen years, and you? - I asked with curiosity as she is a bit taller than me, so I figured she would be older than me.

-I have seventeen flowers of youth… I look younger right? - Yukari replied after a slight silence and smiled again.

-Of course... - I stopped and looked at her very happy.

\- ... Thank you ... - I could not help but be thankful for her unexpected visit and the strange way the events took place, I could not find a better way to express what I felt at that moment, a mixture of happiness and relief. Finally I was talking to someone else while also stopped my own curse. Yukari look at me with a weird look, but smiled in a manner identical to me.

-Well, well, while we eat I hope you can tell me more about you- I said while walking into the kitchen, she nodded and followed me. I had many cravings and curiously it seems that my appetite had increased as I want to eat much more than before.


	5. Death

-Lately everything I do is a kind of hard, like my body started to feel really heavy or something… But don´t worry about it I´m sure it´s nothing…- - I told Yukari as always, with my usual smile and positive attitude.

-Really... - I said looking at me with narrowed eyes and then smiled again. He sat down beside me and looked at both temple gardens. Cherry blossoms gave a beautiful view and butterflies around them did seem almost otherworldly image.

-True… I remember now want you to know her- Yukari told that and then whistled in the direction of the garden, I waited a few seconds and nothing happened.

-¡RAAAAAAAN ! – Cried again hoping for an answer. Soon I heard something and I saw a little fox running down the cobblestone garden path. This curious animal approached quickly and jumped to the stairs and stopped at the side of Yukari.

-I told you already, when I call you should appear at the time… you must learn to be more quickly- She told that and took her umbrella then she bump the fox in the head with it. It only gave a little shriek and ducked it head even more.

-¡NYYAAA ... Nya ... Nyyaa ... - It cried several times.

-You're a not cat, you're a fox. You must learn that if you like cats, you need to respect yourself first… maybe when you have more tails I´ll allow you to have a cat- she replied the cries of the small fox bumping its head once more. Although this time the fox could not resist it and started to growl.

-No, No, bad girl, you should not growl… Yuyu-chan is here be more respectful- she said while keeping the umbrella over the fox head.

-A-Ahhh, n-no problem for me, I think you can stop hitting her Yukari-chan- I told her as she shook her head and smiled. Now that I noticed it was very curious that such an animal had appeared behind her, but perhaps she brought it with her from the beginning.

-Hmmm is this your pet? Why a fox? - I asked quickly trying to change the subject a bit and keep her from abusing this poor animal. Now that looked better was a cute little fox and as she spoke it had to be female.

-Well that's because Ran is not an ordinary fox, plus there are other reasons for which I accepted her as my "pet"…- she said to me very mysteriously, as she tends to talk often like that always having that attitude of a person who knows more than you realize.

-Well she is very cute, I like her fluffy tail. But it´s a bit small, I thought foxes were bigger- replied and noticed that it was really small comparing some drawings and notes on some poems.

-Oh, that's because it is very young, in fact she´s just a little girl, so I have to take care of her and teach her to be obedient from now on- She commented when holding her hand and pat the head of Ran. Yukari might be mean to her but I noticed that she looked at her fondly and I assumed that Yukari had found and adopted her somewhere.

-And did you choose to adopt her? Was it alone or you just liked her? …- I asked as I could not contain my curiosity. But then a bell rang behind the door, meaning that someone asked permission to enter.

My father asked for that bell to be installed before leaving and that allowed me to receive books and outdoor objects without causing major problem.

-The how and why I adopted Ran will be a story for another time ... Now go get that package- she told me cheerful as she take Ran and started caressing her lap.

I got up and walked towards the door. Every time I received a package the guards at the entrance go away so it was safe to open without fear of hurting someone.

I walked with confidence and push the door slightly.

But to my surprise there were no package, but all the guards and monks were kneeling in front of me. At a safe distance of course but only one was closer than the others, this man stood up and came to me with an envelope. He placed at one meter from me and returned to kneel stretching his arm so I took the envelope.

I got a little scared of this situation, I did not know what was happening, let alone wanted to get close, but I had to know the reason why, so I stretch my arm and take the envelope open.

I started reading the content, beautifully written and a road marked with several cherry leaves.

"I hereby leave all my worldly possessions to my daughter, Yuyuko Saigyouji. Now she is now the new head of the clan Saigyouji. Therefore you are free to take control as such ... "

The letter continued with some of the functions of the clan, possessions and lands, as well as all those who served him.

-Yuyuko-sama now we are all available to you and will follow your orders- interrupting my reading told the man who had handed me the letter.

I look and I thought I have seen it before, but did not remember seeing any guards with short white hair.

It was a difficult moment for me because I never thought to become the heir to the clan. I thought my father had remarried, but apparently he remained faithful to my mother.

This situation was complicated now, because I never had anyone as a servant, just because all the guards were acting under the orders of my father and confined me, but now everything could change.

I suddenly remembered that outside the gates of the temple, the whole world was against me. But now that my father died, I regained my freedom.

-I'd like to visit the grave of my father now ... - I said without thinking because that was my desire at the time.

The white-haired man stood up and took a step back and then look at the other guards, when they all rose and formed ranks around, while maintaining a safe distance.

-Very well Yuyuko-sama, we leave now if so desired- he said with a firm voice and a great character. Still, something caused a strange feeling, but maybe it was just my imagination.

-Th-this… n-no rush because it was just an idea, maybe later…- I said, the reaction was instantaneous as did not know anything else to say, because fear overcome me.

-N-not n-need it today, I will return now to temple- I was very distressed and as said that everyone looked at me very attentive, I started to shake and I turned toward the door running.

-So if there is anything you need, feel free to call me Yuyuko-sama, I am here to fulfill your orders…- said the young interrupting my escape. I turned my head a little and look at him, to just blush and run faster, pass the door and closing it behind me.

Yukari looked odd and I get to see my reaction, but then seemed to understand a little.

-I noticed you very agitated ¿were they perhaps good news?- I asked with a smile. She took Ran and put it aside to rise up.

-My father named me heir of the family ... now I'm free ... - I said as I realize my words, now the whole temple was mine.

But then again, a feeling of sadness came over me as I remembered that my father was dead and that I had not yet visited his grave, this made me sick.

-If you are free then you can do whatever you want… want to visit your father resting place?- Yukari said with joy, I knew now that I was free and that I would not need to hold into my pain .

I nodded as she approached to hug me.

-If you want to see him, please close your eyes for a moment- she gently whisper in my ear. I did not doubt it and so I did that, I closed my eyes and imagine how my father was with me the last year, his talks about the world and the changes in society, I recited some of his poems or just talking on any subject. This last year was the only one I had a father.

I opened my eyes and felt tears flowed from them, but then I noticed the change and I was surprised. We were no longer in the temple, but in the midst of a bush.

-This Is Mount Yoshino and here your father Saigyo Hoshi died under this big tree-Yukari told me as I admired the place. I want to know how it happened. How did we get here? But I just stand in silence as she me gently puts a finger on my lips. Then I realized that this was not the time for questions.

Looking at that big cherry tree I noticed something strange in a sense I can't explain but I held strong and I approach it. I touched the tree and knelt down, I start to cry again, at that moment I forgave my father then and started praying for him.

I give my goodbye to him, hoping he will find peace in the other world. I send a mortuary talisman to serve as a reminder that the tree served as a tomb. 

That day sealed my fate.

Two years passed since that day and my life had become something far more serious. I'm twenty years old now and I have responsibilities for my clan, so now I order them from the temple.

-Youken, I charge you that provisions are sent today- I suddenly told the white-haired man who was kneeling in front of me, he was captain of the guards and responsible for many of the things I can't do myself.

\- I will make sure now they will be sent immediately Yuyuko-sama...- he said and stood up.

-Don't overdo it; remember to also think about your wife- I give him encouragement cheerfully.

-Thank you for concern Yuyuko-sama, I will visit my newborn son and my wife as soon as I get back- he said politely then gets up and leaves the site.

-You're who should not try so hard… being a princess is not simple- I listened to Yukari's voice speaking into the hallway after Youken had gone.

-I wish I could take care of simple things like that... - I sighed and then felt this usual fatigue and a small pain in my chest, that lately been a lot heavier.

-Things have not improved… people are still dying at the tree- Yukari suddenly turn serious, reminding me the Mount Yoshino was now the resting place for hundreds of people who died under the cherry trees. People feared and avoided the place, but the death rate keeps increasing for some reason.

-The tree continues to attract people ... Is really no way to stop it without damaging it?- I asked Yukari, but she just looked at me a bit angry.

-I can't stop it now, at least not alone. Its power increases with every soul that absorbs and is far more dangerous now, even for youkai so…- she said trying to avoid my eyes feeling guilty. I knew there was no choice, I had to imagine what she would say, but no words come out of her mouth.

Yukari warned me after my father died, something happened to the tree where he had ended his life. She told me that more people had been killed below the leaves suddenly growing abnormally turning a whole lot more beautiful than others. She warned me about what could turn and asked permission to cut and burn it, but I refused, just because I did not want to lose that last memory of my father.

-I fear… to use my power to kill that tree named Saigyou Ayakashi…- I told her my trying to be brave. I know the tree had obtained a similar power to mine and only I could stop it, Yukari also knew this, but she keep trying to stall it.

-Yukarin… don't worry about me. I will not live too long anyway. At least let me do the right thing as I let this happen in the first place- I said a little wistfully, she bit her lip and turned away from my sight.

I know she felt guilty too. The day we first met I sealed my power inside of me, but because of it, I was slowly dying. To keep my power sealed required more strength that my body could have and before I knew it my life was absorbed slowly.

The color change in my eyes and hair was caused by this, she always knew it, but she tried to keep up a false hope that someday my health suddenly improves.

-There must be some other way to stop it, give me more time… I know I can save you- she said trying to keep calm.

-There is no more time, you know it... - I said as I was invaded with sadness

-You know you can't stop my death, so ... now ... - I approached Yukari, hug her and rested my head on her shoulder.

-I ... I'm asking you ... to let... let me die…- I told with my sad and painfully broken voice as my eyes drop out so many tears that showed my fear… fear of losing this little happiness.

Yukari turned and hugged me in response, this time with greater force. She was my first and only best friend. She who made the most beautiful and happiest of days, who turned a cloudy and dreary day into a sunny and cheerful one.

I dont want to lose her, it's the last thing I want to lose in this world, but it seemed the gods that grants great happiness, one day decide to end it with a great misfortune.

-What was the chance that we ever met? - I asked looking into her eyes filled with sorrow.

-The same probability of seeing a star in the middle of a hurricane- she replied not letting me go. I could not hold back any longer and burst into tears again, sobbing into her chest.

My life will end soon…

That same day I wrote my will and commands that should continue after my death. The occasion and the weather were clear to finish that tree once and for all.

Yukari refused at first… but she knew that there would be more choice, even If both do nothing, the influence of the Saigyou Ayakashi would reach me soon.

That day I also picked up that small thing that gave me life once. I picked up form my room before leaving on my final journey.

I asked Yukari to take me to the place where the cherry tree was… She stood still for a few seconds looking at me, seemed silently lost in thought, so I approached her and take her shoulder.

-Yukarin… come on, this is the right thing to do. Please don't be sad- I said trying to sound as relaxed as I could. My eyes hurt and feel nausea, but I still tried to be as cheerful as I could.

Yukari was silent but I just hug her. I closed my eyes and waited. Those seconds were the most difficult of all my life because it was the last time I could turn back. Although my survival instinct was screaming that I should live, I silently reminded myself why I went through all those years of happiness.

Now there was no turning back.

I felt the smell of the cherry trees upon the wind, so I knew we were now where so many people died before.

I opened my eyes and realized that now the mountain kept an eternal spring with eternal blossomed trees, but at the distance one was bigger and majestic. Looking at it, so beautiful and magnificent was perhaps one of the biggest impressions I had.

-We'll have to walk from here… I am not able to get close without risk- Yukari said sorry, then looked to the side of the road.

-Don't worry I'll be careful, I can walk this much by myself- I replied trying to be happy, but I think anyone would be happy to walk to her own gallows.

I take the hand of Yukari and I cling to it as never before, I was nervous of facing the Saigyou Ayakashi. I felt that she stopped me, turned my head and smiled to my best friend.

-Don't worry… everything will be fine…- I said as she relaxed a bit, then both started to walk together.

The road was covered of petals and leaves, showing the most beautiful cherry tree at the end. One look at it so closely started to give me a strange sense of drowsiness, but I knew I can't relax now.

I kept walking and the shorter the distance between the Saigyou Ayakashi and me, the harder Yukari clung into me.

Soon the tree was in front of me.

-It's time… please take care of the rest Yukari... - I told her who tried to say something but her words disappeared. She stand a few meters away but still looked at me with pain.

-Thank you for being my best friend Yukari… Thanks for being the happiness in my life… I hope we meet again in the other world... - I said being as true as I could, my eyes began to mourn, so I face the Saigyou Ayakashi.

I removed the short sword from my clothes that look at it with some joy, because she this gave me a new life. This sword had released my doubts and confusions that night.

I grasp and lift the blade against my face again read kanji inscribed on it and I felt that my thoughts became clear again.

I approached it to my chest and place its tip at the same spot I did once. In my mind there was only one picture and that was to seal the Saigyou Ayakashi, only in the verge of death my power will return and I'll be able to stop the tree and its own life force.

I pushed the sword into me with all my might and effort, and then I took it out fast letting my life flow into the ground.

I felt a chill and pain inside, my legs began to feel weak and I felt dizzy. I don't know when I fell but the ground was now covered in my blood. I lowered my eyes and noticed that there was a large red stain on my kimono.

I see the tree from the bottom up…

When did I fell to the floor?

When did my body felt so light?

I looked to my left and saw Yukari running to me… The flowers and the color of Saigyou Ayakashi were very beautiful, I never felt so relaxed before.

-Y-Yu ... k ... ooo ... – I hear my friend's voice so close but could not quite understand her. I try to focus on it, but it's still hard to do so.

-The tree...- I tried to talk but it was painful. Yukari was crying a lot, maybe more than I ever did. She nodded as the petals start to fall, hundreds of them at the same time.

It seemed that the Ayakashi Saigyou is dying.

I was relieved and smiled the best I can, even if I taste blood and I cant feel my legs anymore.

-Y-Yu ... Yukarin… please… don't be sad. I want you live on and find happiness…- I wished her with all my strength.

-¡You are my happiness! I will cry for you, I will laugh for you and I will live for you to the fullest…- she told me shouting and crying, as she can't do anything to save me. She embraces me no matter if I stained her with my blood. It was a nice feeling… to feel her warmth around me. My body was cold but because she was here I could still feel something…

-... I want you to remember me ... please ... - I said sadly, she was the only one now that would know my story.

-¡I will remember for all eternity!…- I heard a little distant, wind mingled with his voice. His face showed pain and sadness, so he could only smile.

-If I could... be… be born again... I hope you can be my friend again... - I told her with my last breath. I smiled and felt my eyelids really heavy, my body went colder and I lost sight of her.

The light from the sky suddenly turn into darkness, then I stopped breathing...

-It's true what they say... That a few seconds when you are about to die, you can see your whole life before your eyes in an instant...-

\- I guess that just shows that life and death are separated by a thin line... And that line is the small border of life that disappears when the person dies...-

_"You are sleeping through the long summer days and long winter nights. _

_In a hundred years I will lie down beside you, please wait in peace until that day"_


End file.
